Sometimes I think about how differently children can experience the same family.
The same home.
The same parents.
Many of the same moments.
And yet those experiences may not mean the same thing to each child.
As a Deaf mum, I think about my two hearing sons growing up with BSL and Deaf family life.
They share those experiences, but I cannot assume they understand or remember them in the same way.
Something that feels ordinary to one may feel significant to the other.
What one child notices, another might barely remember.
The same is true of responsibilities and expectations.
One child may feel comfortable with something that another does not.
Neither experience should become the measure of the other.
There is no single CODA story.
Not every experience is difficult.
Not every experience is easy.
And even within the same family, childhood can unfold differently.
I cannot decide now which experiences will matter most to my sons as they grow older.
Those are things they will come to understand in their own ways.
Comparison rarely tells the whole story.
No two CODA childhoods carry the same weight.
REFLECTIVE QUESTION
What might we overlook when we compare CODA childhoods rather than recognising each person's experiences on their own terms?
